by Swami Beyondananda
Hello everybody -- it is great to be here ... and you know what?
We really have no choice. Because no matter where we are, we are
always here. And it is always now. In fact, there's even a book
called The Power of Now. I haven't had time to read it yet, but
I hope to get to it in a later now.
Meanwhile, back in this now, the issue facing the United States,
and indeed the world is, will George Bush give in to his Big Iraq
Attack and order up a war? Latest reports say that a war to force
a regime change in Iraq will cost $200 billion. It is puzzling
to me why some of those fiscal fitness fanatics in the Republican
Party haven't tried to find a cheaper way to do it. Maybe if they
offered the Iraqis half -- $100 billion -- they could do it themselves.
Then we'd still have $100 billion left to spend on regime change
in this country.
Because -- and I have to be blunt here -- the folks we have in
charge are fossils fueled by fossil fuels. And in the reptilian
brain, problems aren't solved, they're attacked. Like the War
on Poverty. Remember that? I'm happy to report that it's finally
over. The poor people have all surrendered. And take the War on
Drugs -- please! How many billions have they spent? My solution
is cheaper and more effective ... improve reality!
Now we have the War on Terrorism. We're going to terrorize those
terrorists into giving up terrorism if it's the last thing we
do! And it just might be. The good news is -- and I have it on
the Highest Authority -- there will indeed be peace on Earth.
Whether we humans are around to enjoy it, that is up to us.
No wonder there is so much fear, uncertainty and confusion on
the planet. I'll tell you how bad it's gotten. You've heard of
Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle? Well, they're not even sure
about THAT anymore. And so, more and more people are turning to
the mystics for answers.
I have often said there are two kinds of mystics, the optimystics
and the pessimystics. Now pessimystics seem to be more in touch
with "reality," but optimystics are happier and live longer for
some reason. The pessimystics have been crying, "The sky is falling,
the sky is falling!" The optimystics say, "No. It just looks that
way because we are ascending."
Now, for those people who read the news -- not to mention those
unfortunate enough to BE in the news -- last year was not an easy
year to keep an optimystic attitude with so much pessimystic evidence.
Call me a hopeless "hopium" addict, but I choose to accentuate
the positive. For example, you can say we human beings have moved
further down the path of self-destruction. Or you could say the
Earth is ridding itself of a virulent parasite.
You can despair over continuing war, disease and starvation, or
you can go, "Hey, population control the good, old fashioned way
-- without birth control or abortion." Who says "compassionate
conservative" is an oxymoron?
You can worry about the government taking liberties with our liberties
or you can say, "Life has become simpler! They've boiled the Bill
of Rights down to just one: You have the right to remain silent."
So I am not going to dwell on the negative. As my guru Harry Cohen
Baba used to say, "Life is like photography ... we use the negative
to develop." So let us look at the bright side.
Like technological advances, for example. Forty years ago President
John F. Kennedy promised to have a man on the moon by the end
of the 1960s. Well, we have far exceeded that. Thanks to the so-called
Patriot Act, George Bush can have a man on Uranus by the end of
the week!
George Bush was responsible for a great spiritual advance last
year, as well. He upgraded the Golden Rule for the new millennium.
It's now the Gold Rule: "Doodoo unto others before they can doodoo
unto you."
And -- say what you will -- President Bush has made great strides
on behalf of minority representation. Never before have we had
a President who was looking out for a smaller minority.
Now this is the State of the Universe Address, and seen from that
higher perspective, things look great! I am happy to report that
the Universe continued to expand in 2002, and in fact, they actually
had to let the Photon Belt out a another notch. An expanding Universe
means more jobs too, so we can expect a steady influx of aliens
looking for work. Yep, theUniverse just keeps purring in perfection,
ever-changing as usual. The planets continue to harmoniously spin
in their orbits, and except for the occasional case of asteroids,
they just calmly go about their business.
Meanwhile, back here on earth, things are a bit more problematical.
We still haven't fully recovered from that vicious dogma attack
of 911. But as an optimystic, I believe you can indeed teach an
old dogma new tricks, simply by changing the emPHAsis to another
sylLABle. Instead of focusing only on emergency measures, why
not take emerge 'n SEE measures?
When we emerge from our fearful hiding places and see from the
cosmic comic perspective, we realize that beneath all the stress
and distress and sadness in life there is a deep well of joy.
Each time we let laughter bubble up from the well, we experience
deep wellness. Levity helps us overcome gravity, especially when
we shine the light of laughter on those poorly-lit corridors of
power.
Do you know what the leading cause of terrorism is? It's seriousness.
I'm serious. Think about it. Those people have no sense of humor.
Otherwise how could they believe they will get to heaven by putting
other people through hell? Here is my vision: A suicide bomber
arrives at the Gates of Heaven, and God clops him over the head
and says, "SCHMUCK What'd you do that for? 72 virgins? YOU get
one 72-year-old virgin, and his name starts with Ayatollah!"
But if Americans are willing to revive the Iraqi Horror Picture
Show just to feed our out-of-control oil habit, how are we that
different? How many innocents will be put through hell, just to
preserve our little corner of relative heaven? There is no real
peace without harmony and balance, only the vicious cycle of injustice.
Peons get tired of getting peed on, right? You get pissed on,
and pretty soon you're gonna get pissed off. This causes the hot
spots to flare, and pretty soon you have an uprising, which usually
results in a downfall. All these uprisings and downfalls can be
wearing on the body politic.
Fortunately, we do have a choice. One of my favorite stories recently
is about a Native American grandfather talking to his young grandson.
He tells the boy he has two wolves inside of him struggling with
each other. The first is the wolf of peace, love and kindness.
The other wolf is fear, greed and hatred. "Which wolf will win,
grandfather?" asks the young boy. "Whichever one I feed," is the
reply.
Every day -- every moment -- we have the choice to feed the wolf
of love or the wolf of fear. It is interesting that we are called
humanKIND. What better time than now to find out, can mankind
treat man kindly?
I have a dream ... I call it tell-a-vision. I say, if you're dissatisfied
with the current programming, you can turn off your TV and tell
a vision instead. Here is my vision: Remember the Manhattan Project
during World War II? It took less than four years for a group
of scientists to develop the first weapon of mass destruction.
My vision is, we can do even better for an even worthier goal.
We could call it the Manhelpin Project, and its purpose would
be to develop the first weapon of mass construction instead.
Think about it. What if we used that $200 billion set to detonate
in Iraq, and put it toward becoming the worldwide leader in renewable,
clean, sustainable energy sources? Now there's some real power.
Create something so plentiful you don't have to pay an army to
protect your share. A healthy income, a healthy outcome ... what
could possibly make more sense? Boy, talk about feeding two birds
with one scone!
The choice is up to us. If we want an alternative, we must feed
the "alter native" economy ... anything that alters us natives
for the better. The world we live in is a byproduct of the products
we buy, is it not? What if we only choose to buy products with
healthy byproducts? Think about this: There are at least 45 million
Americans who consciously want to feed the wolf of peace. If each
of us switched just $100 into the alter native economy, that would
be $4.5 billion!
Last year, we launched a blisskrieg and declared "all out peace."
I'm happy to report it is already working. More people are letting
their inner peace out, and these outbreaks of peace are actually
causing esteem to rise! And we all know that rising esteem is
good for the atmosphere. As esteem rises, more people on the planet
will be able to be all that they can be -- without joining the
army. And when more of us put our energy into love and laughter
instead of criticizing and condemning, we will have Uncritical
Mass ... and we will bring about Nonjudgment Day, and along with
it, Disarmaggedon. Now you might be wondering, what will Nonjudgment
Day look like? Let me tell another vision.
I have been to the heights of levity, and I have seen people all
over the world dancing together in the universal dance of fool
realization ... The Hokey Pokey. I want you to hold this vision
with me: all of the world leaders at the United Nations beginning
their sessions with the Hokey Pokey. What if Ariel Sharon and
Yasser Arafat put their whole selves in in? That would be commitment.
And then pulled their whole selves out. That is detachment. Then
they turn themselves around, which is transformation. And that,
my friends, is what it is all about!
So, how can you help raise the laugh force on the planet enough
to bring about Nonjudgment Day? First, you can take a vow of levity,
and laugh more. And we even have a Laughmore Society to help you
do just that. Next, you can support everyone's right to laugh
by joining the Right To Laugh Party ... "One big party, everyone
is invited. All for fun, and fun for all."
Commit random acts of comedy. Practice Fun Shui and leave the
world a funnier place. Anything to elicit a moment of of fool-realization
with a spark of laughter. Because only when we lovingly laugh
at our foolishness, can we seriously change things for the better
. May you wake up laughing and leave laughter in your wake ...
and may the Farce be with you!
This State of the Universe is © Steve Bhaerman 2002
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